sorry. it's another complaining post. i'm so unhappy right now. every year i don't get to go on a mission's trip, i feel so un-useful. and especially now that i'm out of ministry currently, i am feeling really useless.
i'm not sure what God is calling me to right now. there's a few things i can do like minister to the roomies but besides that, i want to be a part of something great! i want to be able to travel somewhere and meet new people in a different culture and express to them a love that only Jesus Christ could fill their lives with. i want to be able to put myself in danger for His kingdom.
right now...i'm in summer school and i totally do not feel like i am making an impact at all. school has been hard. i've been studying a LOT [at least i think it's a lot cause it's a lot more than i would ever or have ever done] and yet it seems like it hasn't really been paying off. it's so frustrating because i spend hours trying to memorize things but there's so much information that my memory cannot retain it all. i don't know how bio majors memorize all of the terms they need to. i could never.
i think i am just really frustrated right now because of school. *sigh*
Lord, please come down and give me peace. the peace that only you can fill me with. show me new ways to serve you. God, i feel so useless and lame. i need a purpose and to do something for you!! Lord, speak to my heart. show me how to listen to you and obey blindly. i love you.
No comments:
Post a Comment