having attended two end-of-the-year-banquets already, i am starting to get hit with the impending doom of graduating!!
seeing all the faces that have been a part of my life for the past 4 years, viewing old pictures, taking pictures, seeing tears, hearing speeches, exchanging words of encouragement and thanks, and keeping track of how many weeks we have left together have all contributed to my feelings of sadness and bittersweetness.
i wish i had time to spend with each person individually and thank them for how they have blessed me personally. alas, if only. this coming week is going to start the busyness with finals starting, an eventful finals week, and then summer school starting! there seems to never be time to get a breather or an extra hour of sleep.
i'm glad i am staying for another quarter because i don't have to rush all my goodbyes [except to those graduating] and i still have time to hopefully make an impact on UC Riverside's campus before leaving! That is, if it's in God's will. :O)
thank you Lord for placing me at Riverside and blessing me with all the friends and memories and experiences. You are good.
Saturday, May 28, 2011
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
God IS a refuge
man, talk about never experiencing boredom. i'm so busy these days that i have no free time. every part of my day and weekends are packed and i can barely afford to make time for myself. everytime i make time for myself or something not on my agenda, other things get pushed back&procrastinated on. here goes!
God has been working so much in my life. i'm starting to understand more of what i've been going through. He's really been bringing me back to His love again. It makes so much sense to realize that all we need to do is just fully be involved in Him and what He has to say and then everything else will fall into place-relationships, ministry, school, etc. He has it ALL planned out and yet we still take things into our own hands and pretend we know what we're doing until we fail miserably and cry to Him about it which He still graciously listens to us. God is sweet. i love His elaborate plans.
i've forgotten what it is to reflect upon His blessings until recently. i've lost a lot of closeness because of that. so i'm going to praise Him once again for the little things:
-roommates. i'm thankful for every one of them. i miss marissa tons but we're still able to keep in touch with technology which is another blessing. max has been a HUGE blessing that i never saw coming in its full extent. she has met all of what i needed in a roommate for spring quarter and more. grace is always so much fun to bother, tease, love on, and she is so selfless. kristen also exemplifies thoroughly what it means to be selfless. she is still the baking queen and cooking mama. together, all 4 of us have great times laughing, teasing, screaming, scarying, eating, and talking. thank you God for my housemates<3
-family. i'm so thankful for my mom who sends me little texts just to keep me updated on her life and to see how i'm doing or to tell me she loves me. i can't express my appreciation for when she sends me back to r'side with food and lovingly welcomes me home with a hug everytime. she also compliments me on my clothes :O) i also am ever grateful for my older brother Joshua. he always makes me feel special everytime he sends me a random text or leaves me a facebook comment. it shows me that he thinks about me or misses me and i loved going to SD with him and listening to his music&getting music from him aha. i am also thankful for Josiah, my younger brother whom we laugh at immature things together [like voices squeaking or people tripping] or envelop ourselves so deep in our fellowships that we don't even have time for each other :Op [it's a shared experience] and i'm grateful for my dad who shows his love through acts such as fixing my many car problems [throwing tons of money down for that], taking care of my finances, and helping me with my electronics. and who can forget pepp? i love that stinker even though he doesn't feel the same way ha ha ha.
-czrilla. she's stood by me through thick and thin. i can't imagine not having her as my best friend. she's put up with my craziness, my hyperness, my being too busy to talk with her, and still checks up on me. i can be real with her. life wouldn't be the same without her.
-Epic core, servant team, and staff&attendees [and other campus Epics]. i have learned and grown SO much with them all. God has taught me so much about His character, leading, humbling myself, speaking truth, loving, and so much more. i've had the honor of getting to present the Gospel&learning how to do it, sing for worship [always wanted to do that], lead small group [always wanted to do that too], witness people grow in their walk with God [always a fun and encouraging part], i've been stretched and pushed so much out of my comfort zone and it's always left me as a stronger person. i still have SO much to learn and the journey is not over yet!
-AACF family [even those who don't attend anymore but were a part and i met them from AA], they have been there for everything. i've laughed, cried, and gotten angry with them. i've lived with them, learned from them, challenged them, prayed with them, and so much more. i've had some of the wildest adventures and most fun experiences with these guys. birthdays will always be measured up to how AA celebrated. :O) they were supportive and very few of them still come out to epic which means so much. they will always, always have a special place in my heart.
-FECG, church familia, what can i say? these people have been there from the beginning and i can always be real with them. i've gained so much insight from doing separate ministry from church at school and it's given me a deeper understanding of God in so many ways. i have ALWAYS felt welcomed back everytime i came back to church on Sunday after being absent for several months. the uncles and aunties also welcomed my friends when i'd bring them to church. i've enjoyed plenty of weddings and will continue to look forward to them. we've had intense retreats and had our times of drama which brought me closer to some of them. it's also fun sharing experiences about school and parents. church is where we know each other's families pretty well and that helps in getting to know each other better.
i could go on and on and ON of everyone and everything i'm thankful for but it's really late and i need to sleep. i just wanted to thank the gist of everyone and to point all of my earthly/spiritual accomplishments towards Christ. He enabled me to find a fellowship, start a fellowship, and at the same time, still stay connected with my church.
God is just AWESOME, leaving one with a perfectly incandescent feeling.
God has been working so much in my life. i'm starting to understand more of what i've been going through. He's really been bringing me back to His love again. It makes so much sense to realize that all we need to do is just fully be involved in Him and what He has to say and then everything else will fall into place-relationships, ministry, school, etc. He has it ALL planned out and yet we still take things into our own hands and pretend we know what we're doing until we fail miserably and cry to Him about it which He still graciously listens to us. God is sweet. i love His elaborate plans.
i've forgotten what it is to reflect upon His blessings until recently. i've lost a lot of closeness because of that. so i'm going to praise Him once again for the little things:
-roommates. i'm thankful for every one of them. i miss marissa tons but we're still able to keep in touch with technology which is another blessing. max has been a HUGE blessing that i never saw coming in its full extent. she has met all of what i needed in a roommate for spring quarter and more. grace is always so much fun to bother, tease, love on, and she is so selfless. kristen also exemplifies thoroughly what it means to be selfless. she is still the baking queen and cooking mama. together, all 4 of us have great times laughing, teasing, screaming, scarying, eating, and talking. thank you God for my housemates<3
-family. i'm so thankful for my mom who sends me little texts just to keep me updated on her life and to see how i'm doing or to tell me she loves me. i can't express my appreciation for when she sends me back to r'side with food and lovingly welcomes me home with a hug everytime. she also compliments me on my clothes :O) i also am ever grateful for my older brother Joshua. he always makes me feel special everytime he sends me a random text or leaves me a facebook comment. it shows me that he thinks about me or misses me and i loved going to SD with him and listening to his music&getting music from him aha. i am also thankful for Josiah, my younger brother whom we laugh at immature things together [like voices squeaking or people tripping] or envelop ourselves so deep in our fellowships that we don't even have time for each other :Op [it's a shared experience] and i'm grateful for my dad who shows his love through acts such as fixing my many car problems [throwing tons of money down for that], taking care of my finances, and helping me with my electronics. and who can forget pepp? i love that stinker even though he doesn't feel the same way ha ha ha.
-czrilla. she's stood by me through thick and thin. i can't imagine not having her as my best friend. she's put up with my craziness, my hyperness, my being too busy to talk with her, and still checks up on me. i can be real with her. life wouldn't be the same without her.
-Epic core, servant team, and staff&attendees [and other campus Epics]. i have learned and grown SO much with them all. God has taught me so much about His character, leading, humbling myself, speaking truth, loving, and so much more. i've had the honor of getting to present the Gospel&learning how to do it, sing for worship [always wanted to do that], lead small group [always wanted to do that too], witness people grow in their walk with God [always a fun and encouraging part], i've been stretched and pushed so much out of my comfort zone and it's always left me as a stronger person. i still have SO much to learn and the journey is not over yet!
-AACF family [even those who don't attend anymore but were a part and i met them from AA], they have been there for everything. i've laughed, cried, and gotten angry with them. i've lived with them, learned from them, challenged them, prayed with them, and so much more. i've had some of the wildest adventures and most fun experiences with these guys. birthdays will always be measured up to how AA celebrated. :O) they were supportive and very few of them still come out to epic which means so much. they will always, always have a special place in my heart.
-FECG, church familia, what can i say? these people have been there from the beginning and i can always be real with them. i've gained so much insight from doing separate ministry from church at school and it's given me a deeper understanding of God in so many ways. i have ALWAYS felt welcomed back everytime i came back to church on Sunday after being absent for several months. the uncles and aunties also welcomed my friends when i'd bring them to church. i've enjoyed plenty of weddings and will continue to look forward to them. we've had intense retreats and had our times of drama which brought me closer to some of them. it's also fun sharing experiences about school and parents. church is where we know each other's families pretty well and that helps in getting to know each other better.
i could go on and on and ON of everyone and everything i'm thankful for but it's really late and i need to sleep. i just wanted to thank the gist of everyone and to point all of my earthly/spiritual accomplishments towards Christ. He enabled me to find a fellowship, start a fellowship, and at the same time, still stay connected with my church.
God is just AWESOME, leaving one with a perfectly incandescent feeling.
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